Kid Icarus Uprising: Parody Guide
by ScarredWarrior15
Summary: What goes on in the wacky world of Kid Icarus Uprising? Jump right in.. If you dare... Rated K


Chapter 1- The return of Trolltena

Kid Icarus- Uprising- The ultimate PARODY walkthrough!  
"Pits sorry to keep Palutena's pussy waiting."

"It's been to long Lady Pussytena!" Pit says.

"We can fuck later, Pit." Palutena says.

"BUT NOW ITS TIME TO RAPE!" Palutena continues.

"THE UNDERWORLD'S PUSSY'S INVADING!" Palutena screechs

"Whoa! You werent pussying around!" Pit exclaims.

"Use the cock button to fire." Palutena explains.

"You can target enemies with the dildo" Palutena continues.

"If these are Pussyworld troops are you saying CockDusa's been.." Pit starts.

"Fucked. Yes" Palutena says.

"Though the goddess of bitchiness was raped long ago shes' fucked now" Palutena states.

"And as the goddess of dildos it's my duty to protect the hot spring from her!" Palutena says.

"Eh. You cry to much!" Pit whines.

"CockDusa!" Pit yells.

"Hello there Dick. And you too, Pussytena. Here to smash my dildocoming party?" CockDusa asks with annoyance.

Palutena does not think anythings a party because she has to always be serious and she has no sense of humor.

Medusa thinks bloodbaths are festive.

Medusa's been gone for 25 years.

The underworld moves there attack to the ground and Palutena yells at pit saying THEN SO ARE WE.

Pit does not belive anything.

Palutena gave Pit the flower of might. (wait wasnt it the power of night? Eh whatever)

Palutena sucks up to Pit and controls his route so he can focus on being a pussy and battling underworld pussies.

Palutena can only mantain the power of might for 5 minutes and if she does more then that Pits wings will burn up and he will fall and die.

Writer instantly wants to watch Pit fall and die.

Pit is renamed Pita because he is embarrased.

Pit sucks up to Palutena because if he didnt have her help he would be finished.

Palutena gives Pit a useless tip about how if he is not firing he can make it easier to doge attacks by going into a glide. (HELL BITCH I HAVE NO TIME TO STOP FIRING!)

Palutena forces pit to be careful about using charged attacks wisely. (Like hell i wont)

Palutena thinks pit is blind so she asks him how things are looking and says he can turn 3d on if he wants to hurt his eyes so much they fall out.

Palutena thinks its fun to adjust the feeling of depth so we all die when we play this game.

Palutena thinks our destination should be coming into view.

Pit thinks its not right for Underworld pussies to attack the town.

Palutena instantly gains a hatedom for sucking up to humans and helping them.

Pit likes hearing people cheer because he is a suck up.

Palutena thinks its good to celebrate returns of stupid shit.

Palutena thinks that depiste the underworld invasion the humans havnt lost hope.

Pit sucks up to the humans yet again and says that its our duty to protect them.

Palutena forces pit to prepare for land battle.

Palutena teachs noobs how to control the game and congratulates them when they finally stop being tards and learn how to do it right.

Palutena forces people to walk down the ally.

Pit proceeds to eat a floor hamburger,Chocolate and cake.

Palutena tells players what to do and says were here to help the townsfolk so wipe out as many monsters as you can.

Most players ignore her and run to the boss fight and ignore the monsters.

Pit is on it.

Palutena is giving shitty tips yet again.

Pit thinks using a stylus is like spinning a globe (WTF?)

Pits all uhhh. and what was that?  
Palutena tells him it was a evil creature medusa released and the writer uses his pyschic powers to see that it is cerberus/twinbellows.

Most players get runned over by gaint bowling ball thing on there way up.

Pit spits shit at the dog and says he's going to teach twinbellows new tricks but gets mauled.

Pit says now play dead.

Palutena gives out shitty comments again.

Pit thinks its called strafing.

Pit says shity victory taunt that is- Yeah! victory is mine!

Palutena thinks ArmPit did a exellent job at something retarded.

YOUR DAYS OF DARKNESS ARE NUMBERED MEDUSA PREPARE TO MEET THE LIGHT! Pit taunts at Medusa.

I will update when i get 1 review!  
Next chappie is Magnus and the Dark Lord!

Anyways school is starting so dont expect me to update ANYTHING intil weekends/summer.

Bye!  
Chapters i will do-

Chapter 1- The return of Trolltena

Chapter 2- Fagnus and the Gaylord

chapter 3- Heads of the Assdraw

chapter 4- The Reaper's Line of Might.

chapter 5- Mandora's Labyrinth of Pure Deciving Shit.

chapter 6- Asshole Pit

chapter 7- Posideon's palace.

chapter 8- OMG! Palutena lost the 3 shitty treasures!  
Chapter 9- Medusa's not so final battle.

Chapter 10- The gayass seed.

chapter 11- Viridi Bitch Of Nature.

and the rest!


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